The Fingernail, Of Course

Sarah guessed it!

When you've been raised in a place that has a stage that looks like and is called "The Fingernail", you've got no other option than to hold every possible event there. It was also the scene of a tragic family accident, so it only makes sense to return.

Why is there a stage that looks like a fingernail? Radiation exposure likely.

The film festival will be catered. I have chosen KFC in honor of late Grandpa Howard.

The Bell Choir will perform a special musical number, followed by Dad on the accordion.

Missy and I will dust off our jazz boots to perform an interpretive dance to the tune Hakuna Matata with Chad on saxophone.

We will be having a spiritual message along with opening and closing prayers. We don't want Mom to leave feeling guilty.

Josh will only be handing out the programs because when he talks, normal people need wikipedia to understand.

Brad and Thera will most likely be late as they are expected to misplace their video along with their keys.

Ryan will be frisking people as they walk in. It's not necessary but he wants to.

Then if everyone follows through we will finally get to the videos. I can't wait!


First installment of "Weird Things Our Parents Do" -


Then: When we were children we got to watch movies by VCR once every few months. Why? Because my parents went in on the VCR with other couples in the ward (you know who you are) and we only got it a few months out of the year.

Now: Missy e-mailed me to inform us that although Howard specially ordered a Ford Focus with every upgrade Ford makes. He is apparently too cheap to spring for floor mats and has cut carpet cubes for his sweet ride from carpet scraps he was likely storing for no apparent reason.

Which suddenly reminded me of the old minivan which had absolutely zero upgrades, but we still rode around sitting on towels (not occasionally but always) to protect the upholstery.